Friday, November 13, 2009


I don't know about you, readers, but I think "Los Angeles Kings" is a hilarious misnomer, because no one who's ever played on that team has ever, at any time, been King of Los Angeles. In fact, no human ever has. What morons!

But seriously, if L.A. had a king, who would it be? Philip Marlowe? Henry Rollins? Harvey Weinstein?

Anze Kopitar might be a good candidate for "King of L.A. but kind of a Slovenian usurper," what with all his goals and points this season.

Which leads us to the central point: the Kings are damn good this year. GM feller Dean Lombardi has been criticized a bit for not making the playoffs at all recently, but it's clear enough that all this time he was patiently building---mostly through the draft, though lately with some truly ace trades---a monster. Now it's fully formed and ready to kill us all.

But the Thrashers can totally win this game, because with Kovalchuk in the fold they're awesome, right? Which brings me to today's "In Praise Of..." section.

This game day, we would like to praise last night's dazzling effort against the New York Rangers. I could watch the replay of Evander Kane's goal, complete with awesome pass from Rich Peverley, exactly 10 million times. Same with Peveley's power play goal: one-timer blast from Kovalchuk, bounce off of an Antropov-screened Lundqvist, straight to the Pevs Dispenser and then into the net. Beautiful.

As some of our commenters have already pointed out, the level of confidence goes up quite a bit when the Czar's around. There were some imperfections, but I'd wager that last night's game was the most complete, most confident game the Thrash have played this season. And it was the most entertaining: lots of goals, including strikes from the Superstar on each team; a hellacious Boulton vs. Brashear fight; and Zach Bogosian ruining Ryan Callahan's evening. Say, with his mustache doesn't Bogo look like he should be quietly selling arms in a low-lit, slightly grubby cafe?

Anyway, it was a real cool time.

As for the bout tonight: Kings blogger Rudy Kelly, a great among greats at the great blog Battle of California, is a huge Kovalchuk fan and is mighty stoked about tonight's game:

Just think of it: Kopitar v. Kovalchuk; Doughty v. Bogosian; Fro v. Maxim...


UPDATE: DO check out Mr. Kelly's official game day post.


j_barty_party said...

Morty, nice morning blog...quite a stout collection of well-assembled nouns and verbs.

What more can we say about Ten Gallon Dick?? Let's hope the fastest draw in Guelph, ON can dazzle the hometown fans with another slick display of smoke-wagon wizardry!

As for the live blog feature last night by Razor, I was duly entertained even AFTER I had just finished watching the game. Twas nice to relive the excitement and also enjoy your comments about Crown Royal being the preferred drink of sissy Canadian men who can't handle real bourbon! For that I may just have to send a package of Maker's Mark infused bourbon balls to the Chronicle HQ for Christmas! Bravo sir Bravo!

Razor Catch Prey said...

Mmmmm, Maker's Bourbon Balls...

Actually, Morty, I see Bogosian more sitting in a low-lit, slightly grubby cafe listening to music from an alien band and telling a green skinned bounty hunter that Jabba will get his money, right before blowing a hole in his chest from under the table. "Sorry about the mess."

A2B said...

"Our line was clicking real well," he said. "We all speak Russian, so it's kind of cheating because they can't understand what we're saying."

You know those guys are having fun out there when they are messing with the other team by speaking Russian (Kovy and crew).

j_barty_party said...

A2B - that quote is priceless and I used it as inspiration for my latest blog headline. If Kovy can somehow teach Max how to lift the puck off the freakin' ice in tight on the goal, then this line could end up being scary good!

Should the next poll question center on the best nickname for this Russian Trio?

a) Comrade Connection
b) Russian Roulette
c) Perestroika Line (nice one RCP!)
d) Christ Almighty! Line (Kovy plays better than Christ & MM and Nik make me scream this at games)

A2B said...

So why don't we call the top line the KGB line? They are all Russian, speak russian so no one can understand what they are doing, and they are sneaky about their attack.

Razor Catch Prey said...

I like the Russian Roulette line. Whenever they get the puck there's a 1:6 chance they fire one home.

To me, a KGB line would have to have Kozlov on it. I picture stoic, quiet, unsmiling Russians with the KGB, not the exuberant, interesting Russians like Kovy, Antro, and Fins. That's why I came up with Peristroika Line- it was part of the new Russia.

Mr. Speaker said...

RCP - indeed! I like Roulette and Perestroika. KGB DEFINITELY needs Slava and his stoic, wine-drinking ass on it. Eventually, Max will pull that shooting % down to like 1 in ever 16 so we should probably stick with Perestroika!

RudyKelly said...

Vin Scully is the king of Los Angeles. And your all-Russian line will be infiltrated by Alex Frolov tonight. Well, they would be except Frolov can't really speak English.

Mortimer Peacock said...

And Rudy Kelly makes his (I think?) Chronicle debut!

j_barty_party said...

Y'all might enjoy this so click on the linky (if it works) and enjoy some breaking news!

And yes, yours truly asked him the all important lead question!