Friday, October 9, 2009

Just How High Can He Go.... Heennngghhh?


Well, let me be the one billionth person to congratulate our Czar on reaching 300 goals. This did get me thinking, just how many CAN he actually score? Let's review, shall we? The man is 26 years old, and in 7 NHL seasons where he stayed mostly healthy, he has reached 301 goals. That is an average of 42 goals per season. Those are downright frightening numbers. Just what, exactly, have you done with YOUR life... hmmm?

Let's stay on the safe side as we try and project the rest of his career. You never know how long someone will play, or how much they will play due to injury. Kovy is entering the prime of his career, so lets say over the next five years he averages 40 goals per season. That puts him at 31 years old. Let's then drop him down to an average of 30 goals over the next five seasons, putting him at 36 years old. Somewhat doable, would you say?

And because my head starts to hurt when I do all teh numberz, we will stop there even though we know our Czar will play until he is 50. By stopping him at age 36, that allows perhaps for some missed time due to injury throughout the years, and helps keep our possible number reasonable. Everyone still with me?

This little experiment puts our Czar at 650 career goals (and if things go well, could easily score over 700)! Pretty incredible wouldn't you say? Just think, if we didn't have the lockout, you could probably add another 40 goals to the total he already has. But if we did that he would have scored 300 goals a while ago, thus I would have written this post a while ago. Hey, what a minute... am I stuck in some sort of Back to the Future monkey time machine?!?!? Great Scott... help me Doc Brown! 1.21 gigawatts, get me out of here!!

So now, what do you all think of my little deal here? Too many goals? Not enough? You don't give a sweet who-ha? Just how many can the man score?

20 comments:

Daculafan said...

You never know...but 500 in my opinion is a lock unless he gets really injured or somehow forgets how to skate.

Not only is his scoring prowess highly refined..he's becoming more and more a complete player. He is beginning to work down low in the defensive zone and showing that he's catching on to two way hockey.

Let's just go ahead and name him the Hart Trophy winner!!

Big Shooter said...

I prefer to think of him more of a Conn Smythe kind of guy...

Daculafan said...

Why not both?...and since I'm throwing it out there let him have the Art Ross and Rocket Richard trophies as well. We'll give Bogo the Norris..Evander the Calder and Pavs the Vezina.

This leaves Dany Heatley with the Lady Byng (lol)

Mortimer Peacock said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Big Shooter said...

I beg to differ, Morty. Let's say all goes well... he stays healthy, and over the next 10 seasons he averages 40 goals (which is less than what he has done the first 7 seasons).... BOOM! 700 goals.

Razor Catch Prey said...

I think he'll play until he's 65 years old, scoring one goal per year for the final five years of his career, just so he can inch his way up and take Gretzky's all time goal record.

Mortimer Peacock said...

WAIT WAIT, CORRECTION.

I MEANT "POSSIBLE." JESUS. WHAT'S WRONG WITH ME?

In reality, I think I meant to say "It's not impossible" and then that got confused with "It's totally possible."

I hate myself.

Big Shooter said...

Ah, in another Chronicle first, our editor has censored himself.

(Slap in the face) THAT'S for blasphemy.

Mortimer Peacock said...

"If the Czar isn't allowed to score his 720 goals, the armies of darkness will march all over the face of the earth."

Mortimer Peacock said...

P.S. I think Sean Leahy at Puck Daddy committed a serious party foul by not giving Kovy at least an honorable mention for scoring his 300th. I mean, he gave one to Ryan Getzlaf for playing his 300th game, so...

Speaker of Stuff said...

I just want a leather kilt with the Czar's stoic face on it...cold dark eyes of vindication boring holes into your face non-believer!

Hopefully, we are talking about Kane in these terms in 6 or 7 years. I'll start a blog about the baddest mofo, sugar-kane daddy this side of 'da 'Couve!!

Big Shooter said...

Big "Oh my God it's Big Shooter" Shooter, has dealt with Leahy's oversight in their comment section. Even with this foul, Puck Daddy is still the best in the biz...

GoPuckYourself said...

Apparently Kovy's goal-scoring caused a ruckus in St. Louis post-game.

http://www.fox2now.com/ktvi-scottrade-escalator-accident-100809,0,1776501.story

krisabelle said...

Nothing would bring me quite a swelling of pride more than Kovy scoring 700 goals! Also, I would like to pre-order the leather Kovy-faced kilt. The NHL should expand their licensed merchandise line anyway. I suggest Kat Von D as the NHL's new leatherwear designer. The could call it NHHell. :)

Mortimer Peacock said...

Kat Von D for the NHL! Oh man, imagine the possibilities...

Mortimer Peacock said...

GPY-

ahahahahaha...I know I shouldn't laugh at spastic escalators and their victims, but, but but...wahahahahaha

Laura said...

Could someone please explain to me how our broadcast crew missed Kovy's 300th when it happened, and didn't say anything until the end of the brodcast? Fox Sports Midwest said something, KMOX said something, Kamal said something, and Ben tweeted right when it happened.

I was so pissed off I couldn't get the St. Louis feed last night. Here I was thinking that I would be spared our guys. Damn.

Mortimer Peacock said...

Yeah, that was really annoying. I kept waiting for them to say something, but...

Laura said...

What I can't understand is how our broadcast is so damn ghetto. The camera work sucked, the non HD feed was horrible quality, the camera work is awful, and Mitch McConnell didn't know how to pronounce Perron's name, and got Johnson confused with Steen at one point. Did they not get their fact sheet, or can they not bother to read it?

Mortimer Peacock said...

I know! I've ALWAYS wondered why the camera work and overall cinematography sucks so badly. I mean, the film has this dull, gross green-yellow tint and, well, yeah, the camera often can't even find the puck.

It is sad.