Friday, June 25, 2010

Johnny Burma Craps on KHL

Writing from Mr. Speaker's laptop, as we (Speaker, K-Belle, Monsieur, and myself) all just returned from the surreal and demure draft party. We met famous Chronicle operative "Jay" there, who is a swell guy in real life, so hooray!

Anyway. I see my comrade Razor Catch Prey isn't too keen on this Alexander Burmistrov fellow, and I understand his horror. I must admit I'm not excessively keen myself, but then again, I'm pretty ignorant of this Barrie Colt, except for this:

"I really hate the KHL," Burmistrov told NHL FanHouse. "I really, really hate it. It's for old guys. I don't want anything to do with the KHL for a long, long time ... maybe ever."

The young man hates the KHL and doesn't want to play there. This is a Good Thing. He's compared, hyperbolically, to Igor Larionov and Pavel Datsyuk. He will likely be nothing like either of those esteemed cerebral Russians, but he might be a fine player. The Big Point here is that no one who writes for your Chronicle knows much of anything about this poor bastard, so God help us.

Your TBC editor loves Cam Fowler and Jack Campbell, like he enjoys any Team America hero, but the Fact of the Matter is we know very little about anything to do with the Future of Earth's Hockey.

I would have taken Fowler, probably. But then again we have so many defensemen that we probably don't need another.

This is probably some kind of ploy to entice Nabokov and re-entice Kovalchuk. It will fail.

Nonethless, Alexander Burmistrov will be known now and forever as "Johnny Burma." Hooray for Life.

15 comments:

Wayne stuck in AL said...

Do McGuire and McKenzie ALWAYS have nothing but nice things to say about every draftee?

I'm not sold on having another Russian on the team, but, look, we're supposedly stocked with D-men and serviceable goalies (this year's playoffs showed you don't need a superstar goalie to win), and we've needed a 1st-line center since 2006. (I keep waiting for this second trade Dudley is supposed to pull off for a scorer.)

Anyway, that's the way I see it from my neck of the boondocks.

Big Shooter said...

We have so many defensmen? I suppose so seeing as how we don't really need Kubina (sarcasm alert!!!). Please. When you actually have success, then you can tell me how we are so deep we don't need to take good players. You don't pass on Fowler because Kulda or Postma is in the system. Then again I suppose at some point you have to replace Morin (another sarcasm alert, for the slow of thought).

For the first time in ten years I actually want to turn my season tickets back in.

Mortimer Peacock said...

Anyone who says "sarcasm alert" is a sad panda. Anyway, Mr. Folwer will be excellent for the Ducks.

FrenchCatalogues said...

Fowler won't play for a bit anyways. Honestly, we have a fine tradition in sucking so who cares. So wait a bit while sucking? Either pick is irrelevant right now. We've been picking for the past decade and here we are so I ask to the people upset, just now getting angry?

krisabelle said...

Can't we take a wait and see approach instead of immediately jumping to the fatalistic zenith o' doom? If everyone dumps on someone immediately instead of seeing what they're about once they step onto the ice for our team, what is the point? Life is full of surprises, both good and bad; why take to the wailing wall before even giving someone a chance?

Mutton Sourdough said...

So Alex Burmistrov forever after is to be known as Johnny Burma, and as "Chuck" won the poll, Todd White is now Chuck.

I'm on the fence about Burmashave. I like that he burned the shit outta the KHL bridge in order to help build his NHL bridge, and I like his skillset and determination, but I'm more than a little concerned that his determination may cause him to be too uncompromising in contract talks or with coaches (just don't know enough about him). I'm also concerned that even though the KHL bridge seems burned he may still set the controls for the heart of the polar bear's ass. Recent, and not-so-recent history suggests that the thought of big$$ and playing in one's homeland is often enough to lure Russian-born players back to the Motherland, though I've read it suggested that it's not quite so simple. However, I can't say that if I were playing a sport in a premier league in another country on another continent and a competitor league, even a lesser competitor, offered me a contract to play at home, I would be lying if I said I wouldn't even consider it.

Big Shooter said...

Sarcasm alert was meant for our dear friend Mr. Speaker as he had a brief moment earlier today where he forgot what it was while talking on the Twitter. Just trying to have a little inside fun with him, you Sad panda you!

Look. I'm not dumping on who we picked. If you read closely I haven't said one bad thing about him. I'm dumping on who we passed up. Lest you forget I've been here from Day One and seen every sad, stupid thing this franchise has ever done. Combined with the fact I don't really like or have faith in Dudley, well it just gets hard to take after a while.

We'll see. If Fowler and Campbell or any of the other guys I thought we should have taken turn out to be complete NHL busts, I'll gladly admit how stupid I am. It's just that I've seen this before and at some point you just stop being able to take it.

Jay said...

It was nice meeting you guys tonight! Maybe there can be a LIVE Fantasy Hockey draft in our future?

Anyways, the more I thought about the pick of Burmistrov, the more I like it. Think about it, we all know that Dudley LOVES size. This kid is a string bean, but is so good Dudley said, "Fuck it, I can't pass him up". That's a pretty good sign for me.

GoPuckYourself said...

I do have to say that I feel somewhat better about this pick after sleeping on it. I'm not in love with the move, but he's not related to Alex Bourret, so maybe things will work out.

Regardless, he hates the KHL so he's good in my book.

Mortimer Peacock said...

Mutton-

Agree 100% with all you say.

And yes, Alex Burma is Johnny Burma, and Toddford White is forthwith Chuck White.

Mutton Sourdough said...

Here's an article I'm sure y'all have already read as well, but I thought I'd put it here just in case.

http://www.nationalpost.com/sports/story.html?id=3000711

A little old, that article, but it reflects some good qualities that make this pick look not-so-g'damn-awful.

韋以 said...

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GoPuckYourself said...

Forget what the TSNs and ESPNs and TBCs think of this draft pick. It seems asian porn's a big fan of this draft pick. That's all the affirmation I need.

Mortimer Peacock said...

We really might have to think of new ways to spell "Ten Gallon Dick."

Not that Asian porn is BAD thing...

Mutton Sourdough said...

I blame you for this one, Morty. "Sad panda" absolutely HAD to be the key phrase that drew in Asian Porn.

I wonder what the average over/under is for the number of posts before Asian Porn in-FILL-traits...