Did you enjoy your weekend, Thrashingwhores? Did you go out for fish tacos and Corona? Did you follow the wild up-and-down antics of our Actually Good local sports team, the Braves? Did you enjoy staring at Christina Hendricks on the Emmy's thingy? Was your Honor Restored?
One of the strange things that happened to your editor over the weekend was Big Shooter sending him this, from vital hockey mind Rick Dudley:
We think [Chris] Thorburn is capable of scoring. He did in junior. I know the player really, really well way back from [OHL] Sudbury. I think he’s capable of being more than a fourth-line guy. If that happened we are in pretty good shape because he’s a big, fast guy that plays with an edge. Those guys, if you can play them a lot, in a top-three line situation, that’s invaluable. We also have [Patrick] Rissmiller. There are things that are questions, but they are all positive questions.
There you have it folks. Patrick Rissmiller and Chris Thorburn will morph into 20-goal quasi-snipers. Dudley also counts on Alexander Burmistrov making the team immediately, despite the fact that the new Russian is "very slight" at the moment. He also counts on Evander Kane having a breakout year, Bryan Little bouncing back, and Andrew Ladd scoring anywhere between 15 and 25 goals. Meanwhile Dustin Byfuglien will play defense and Nic Bergfors will...um...what IS going on with that Bergfors signing?
UPDATE: Scanning through the comments to this wacky report, I see that several people---including our friend Mr. Speaker/Smoothie/The Smoother of Wakefield---are making the case that Dudley's talk is some kind of theatrical media massage. What's REALLY going on, many say, is that there's going to be a trade in the near future. Something along the lines of Valabik, Bergfors, and a 1st for Jeff Carter or Jarome goddamn Iginla. Maybe. I remain skeptical. "Skeptical" as in "there is no way such a thing will happen."