Tuesday, March 8, 2011

IRONY! Thrashers to be sold to Ilya Kovalchuk!

The Blueland Chronicle has learned* that the Atlanta Spirit Group has reached a tentative agreement to sell the Atlanta Thrashers to a group of current and former NHL players headed up by Ilya Kovalchuk. The Russian star will be joined in his venture by Dany Heatley, Donald Audette, Marc Savard, Marian Hossa, Damien Rhodes, Mike Dunham, Byron Dafoe, Ray Ferarro, and Milan Hnlicka.

The deal includes rights to the Atlanta Hawks as well, but Kovalchuk has already stated that he intends to move the NBA franchise to Winnepeg effective before the team's next home game.

* By "learned," we of course mean "made up."

4 comments:

Anonymous said...

One correction...the preferred spelling of his name is, Mike Fucking Dunham.

Razor Catch Prey said...

We prefer not to utter his name at all, but in this instance I felt that comedic principle demanded it.

Mortimer Peacock said...

Razor-

I lul'd, as the kids say.

Anon-

I lul'd, as the kids say.

World-

Ilya Koalchuk is exactly what we (we being the Chronicle) thought he was.

GoPuckYourself said...

Morty quoting Dennis Green/Coors Light commercials?

Surely this means the world is ending.

RCP--Well done, sir. It's only a matter of time before TSN picks up the story.